Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Gyp59]

This is my first time writing on a forum. I am 65.  I have dysthymia and major depression and i am struggling with looking after myself and doing basic chores. Trying to cook is very irritating to me as I can't coordinate myself.  I have such a messy bedroom it overwhelms me every day. My memory is causing me problems and that exacterbates anxiety.  I can't remember from one day to next what I've been doing.  I live in a rural area, have no neighbours or friends.  I'm isolated and lonely but cant move anywhere else because I don't have a job or money. Social anxiety is affecting me as well so i dont go to my very small nearest town as i am afraid someone will recognise me and ask questions thst i cant answer and I might burst into tears. I'm scared that I'm going to die soon as I have nothing to look forward to in life as I never ever feel good enough.  I have a partner but we are practically estranged under the same roof and he doesnt want to understand mental illness. I have had a lot of trauma throughout my life and no doubt thst has had a negative affect on me.  I've tried many different medications over the last 25 yrs but nothing works..I just end up with terrible side affects. I feel like I'm running out of time. Help

[tacocat]

Hi @Gyp59 

I hope you find the community and connection you need here with us on the forums. There are many other people here are in a similar boat to you. Perhaps you'd like to Introduce yourself here if you haven’t already?

We look forward to seeing you around on the forums 🙂

[8ppleTree]

Hi @Gyp59 

Welcome to the forums 😄

It sounds like you have quite a lot to get through each day with your conditions. It's completely understandable that you might feel overwhelmed when socialising. Have you spoken to your doctor recently? Is this something that has always been an issue, or is it getting worse for you lately? It sounds like you may need a bit of extra support, and your GP may be able to get the ball rolling for you.

Isolation and confusion are awful, darling. Do you journal? I find that it can give me a bit of continuity and solidify the day-to-day flow. Also, keep a whiteboard with important notes, ideas and dates up on it. Visible reminders can really help. 

It must be really difficult to feel so misunderstood in your home. Do you belong to any support groups? Would you be interested in chatting to someone and thinking about ways to get a bit more support? If so, you can get in touch with SANE's free counselling service to speak to a trained counsellor. Call the SANE helpline on 1800 187 263 or send us an email at getsupport@sane.org.

Be kind to yourself. Keep reaching out for help. You're doing the best you can x