Lived Experience Forum

[QueenB81]

This is all new to me at the age of 42 I am embarking on a full career change to become a peer support worker in FDV, drug and alcohol addiction, crisis situations. It's a journey that became clear last year to me as I await for spinal surgery to have my C5/C6 infused and disc replacement. I live in pain everyday with nerve pain shooting down my left arm and distress to the muscle groups connecting to the C5/C6 area. An injury I received from my ex who was reckless in the bedroom that saw the back of my head impact my bedside table not once but twice within a month. The head traumas caused my disc to bulge and collapse on the left side while infringing on the nerve. This so me grounded by the GP and specialist to cease work immediately as I could no longer do bar work as my work of intensive manual labour would cause serious damage to my injury.

While I have not been able to work for 2 years now while I had undergone every scan imaginable and exhausted every temporary treatment my surgeon realised that a spinal infusion was the only way to fix me. In this time I was trying to figure out what I wanted to do as a new career realising my days in hospitality is over. I had a chance meeting in July last year with the CEO of Hope Foundation who triggered me in regards to how teenager go back to their abuser instead of the accommodation provided through DCP. Understanding why I was triggered I gave her an answer from my own lived experience with DCP as a teenager. It was in this moment that I realised exactly what my true calling is as this lady explained to me about Peer Support work.

As part of my pathway to peer support is sharing my story and as I have relived my past experience I came to realise I have been through so much and sat there thinking to myself how did I survive it all.

Just before my 12th birthday I started to be sexually abused to which I was sexually abused for nearly 3 years. At the age 14 I finally spoke out to what was happening to me behind closed doors to my closest friends at school. One of my friends reported this to the school principle to which DCP were called. By my last period of my school day I was called to the office where I met by to DCP people. At first I denied all claims to my sexual abuse as the DVP people explained to me that I was safe and they would be able to help me escape my abuser with safe emergency accommodation with a foster carer and they would be there for me every step of the way. So I finally caved in and told them what was happening to me. Of course I had to make a full statement to the police and the man was arrested and charged and DCP acted on my behalf during the trial to which I was denied to take the stand. During my time under DCP as ward of the state I was moved around from youth shelter to youth shelter and share accommodation and foster homes which caused me to not be able to continue my education. I made an attempt on my life when informed my abuser found innocent of the crimes against me, this made feel let down by not only the very system that was suppose to protect me and keep me safe but also the justice system. I had no support from DCP to help recover from my trauma and no counselling provided nothing. I spent my days fighting to survive and eventually decided to simply go back home and forced the hand of DCP to sign me back over to my mum and my abuser. Because at least I had a home that provided my basic needs and allowed me to have an education and a job. If I had of stayed under DCP my future would have seen me in a life of crime or worse dead.

As an adult due to my unhealed trauma I ended up in a narcissistic relationship that lead me to meth as my coping tool to numb the pain from my ex and the pain that resurfaced from my sexual abuse. Narcissistic abuse is the worst kind of abuse it knocks you down gradually as your abuser isolates you so you have no support network with friends and family. You are all alone and after 7 years I saw in the mirror of my harsh reality that I was nothing more then a mere empty vessel running on auto pilot not knowing who I am anymore. It was in that moment I broke down into uncontrollable tears as I realised just how broken I was. My reliance on meth to cope with numbing my pain became the very thing that allowed me to leave my narcissistic ex but at the cost of also having to walk away from my children as I had no support to help me. The hardest thing ever had to do was walk away from kids as I was so broken and had no idea where I was going and my ex made sure of that through his constant abuse. 

But I left to save myself so I can become strong again and come back and save my children. I fought my addiction to meth and embarked on my soul journey to healing and rediscovering who I am. In the 7 years to come I found away to take my power back and seeked advise on how to navigate getting my children back. Unfortunately family courts was not an option as I couldn't prove what my ex was doing to my kids or prove that he to was a meth user an alcoholic. I would have been rail roaded in court by my ex, so I had to play the long game and find away to not only have access to my kids when ever I wanted but also find away to get to my ex with false pretences to see what he was doing and use that as leverage to eventually force his hand to relinquish his parental rights and send my kids back to me with no backlash from him to me and my kids. 

In that 7 years of healing and remembering who I am and my sheer determination to win the final battle between my ex and I to save my kids from him. I over came my addiction for meth and created a stable life for myself and full-time employment as well as a stable home for my kids. I am proud of myself for never giving up and doing exactly what I set out to do on the day worst day of my life leaving my ex and my kids. I accomplished everything I needed to do for myself to come back and be the mother my kids needed me to be and I have never looked back.

This is my a brief version of my story on how I survived everything that should have not only destroyed me for life but my children's lives as well living with the grief of loosing their mother. I have turned my pain into strength to give the courage to do the things I needed to do to have a brighter future for my kids and myself. 

Today I have fully recovered and now ready to use my lived experience to help others who are going through similar things that I did and become their inspiration that there is light at the end of the tunnel. That with sheer determination you can overcome everything that has hurt you or destroyed you and come back better then you ever were before. That'd my mission statement to myself to be that beacon of hope as I navigate this journey to become a Peer Support Worker.

Any advise and support that can help me achieve this goal to Peer Support Worker were be greatly appreciated as my passion and drive to make a difference to the victims lives that I hope to be working with in the future.

[Ainjoule]

Hey @QueenB81 ,

Sounds like you have been through a lot and have a lot to offer people as a Peer Worker. I also have spinal fusion (around my C7) and like you I'm am embarking on a journey to be a Peer Worker. What state are you in? There are places available in the Certificate IV in Mental Health Peer Work, some states there are scholarships. Are you planning to study this course? It's possible that some of the content in your post will need trigger warnings, I'm sorry you have been through so much. It's great that you are able to use your life experience to benefit the lives of others. I look forward to you posting about your journey here.  

[QueenB81]

Hi @Ainjoule I live in WA and COMWHA is the organisation that has 2 programs Aspire for people like us starting our journey into peer work and skill set program for people who have employment paid or unpaid and volunteer to qualify for that course which is a dual certIV in mental health peer support, as well as an opportunity for a scholarship through COMWHA. 

And yes I have lived through so much and my brief outline is only the surface, I couldn't tell my full story as it has major trigger warnings and extreme contexts that is of a harmful nature. But let's put it this way, I survived everything that was meant to end me and I didn't cower in the face of adversity by the ones who tried to harm me. And maybe that was my saving grace, my courageous and fearless determination to stay alive. 

Also I don't know how to apply trigger warning tag to my original post as i literally only signed up last night

[Minkie-Rose]

Hi @QueenB81 

I am humbled by your strength of character, enduring sense of self, and aspirations to support other people in difficult life situations. The world needs more people like you, noting the relevance of lived experience to peer support work and mental health counselling.  

While not currently employed in the peer support space (I am in-training to become a counsellor), most advertisements for peer support workers or similar, specify a need for applicants to have:

• Lived experience in mental ill-health
• A Certificate IV in Mental Health or above
• Demonstrated knowledge of recovery-orientated approaches to mental health.
• Relevant work or volunteer experience.

Interestingly, it seems that discretion is often used in applying these 'essential requirements, including in qualifications and practical experience, so please keep this in mind as well.

Having been fortunate to enjoy a long career with local, state and federal government agencies, over which time I recruited people with varying qualifications and levels of experience, I suggest the following:

• Obtain as much relevant volunteer experience as time and resources allow.
• Explore opportunities to gain formal qualifications in mental health (certificate or graduate certificate level)
• Apply for roles that you are eligible, or close to being eligible for. In this regard, gaining interview experience will be invaluable.
• Explore similar roles that are less restrictive in terms of essential requirements (e.g. providing practical support to people with a physical challenge or learning difficulty). 

Importantly, ' don't let anyone tell you what you can't do, persist and follow your dreams' (Barack Obama).

I hope this helps. 

[Ainjoule]

Hey @QueenB81 

It's great that you have found an organisation that you can apply to do the course with! I'm pretty excited at the moment because I am in the process of enrolling with a private college under NSW's smart and skilled program. I know that the MHCC were also enrolling people in my state, but I had already applied to the private college so I'm going to stick with that. It sounds like you are all ready to go...I know for example there are vacancies for peer workers in my local mental service so there are probably some in yours to...it's a good time to be getting into Peer Work.

Good on you for that courageous and fearless determination to stay alive, it has served you well. 

[GardensHeart]

Hi @QueenB81 , 

You can apply the trigger warning tab following these steps:

- After typing the content, you just need to select the parts/paragraphs you want to apply it to, 

- Click on the three little dots (at the end where you can change font, add emojis) to expand the toolbar

- From there, select the little triangle with the exclamation mark 

All the content you wish to put the trigger warning in should now be grouped together. I hope I am explaining it well enough...

[MermaidHair]

Hello @QueenB81,

Wow, thank you so much for sharing your story here. What a fantastic testament to resilience, overcoming adversity and triumph over tribulations, I am so proud of you!

I was also inspired by my lived experience and the things I have overcome to get into peer support work. I actually started out here at SANE by participating in the peer guide program and now I continue to volunteer here for peer support. I've also started studying a certificate IV in mental health peer support. 

Through the TAFE I am studying at there is a certificate in alcohol and other drugs which might be more aligned with the kind of work you're interested in? There are so many different types of peers workers and different pathways but the main criteria is having that lived experience and being able to use it in a way that fosters and supports others recovery. 

We have lots of peer support workers here as well as peer guides and people interested in peer work, so I'm sure you'll get heaps of great feedback!

Once again thank you so much for sharing your story, it is honesty amazing what you have achieved and managed to conquer so far. I wish you the best for the rest of your journey 💜

[QueenB81]

@Minkie-Rose thank you for the valuable advise. I have been applying for volunteer work and today received a reply to my express interest in the role of "Social Companion" in an aged care facility with full training provided. I am excited for this role as I know the residents of aged care facility suffer from loneliness and the loss of so many friends and loved ones over the years and how that impacts their mental health and overall well-being.

I am waiting for the next intake for the ASPIRE program through COMWHA designed for people starting their peer support journey. I have also gained a spot in one of their workshops "introduction to peer work". I will also be looking out for the next opening for shortcourses/workshop for supporting the recovery and telling your story, mental health first aid, and a few other short workshop training with other organisations in WA. I know these workshops will assist me in gaining a better understanding of a peer support work as well as developing the correct tools in supporting victims, families and survivors.

I will be doing my dual cert IV in mental health peer support after my spinal surgery and post op recovery. If I miss the next the intake for the skill set program with COMWHA then I will utilise the government funding allocated to me for reskilling to cover the cost of going to Tafe directly.

That's my strategy to obtain the skills and work experience while I wait to be able to do the dual course for my accreditation. 

What's your thought on my strategy 

[QueenB81]

@Ainjoule thank you for your kind words and I wish all the best with your journey to peer support worker. I have now doubt that you be an incredible peer support worker as you shape the lives of the victims and survivors to a brand new bright life

[Minkie-Rose]

Hi @QueenB81 

I believe that strategies which gently familiarise aspirants with what it means to be a peer support worker, are eminently sound.

To this point, gaining experience in an aged care setting would seem a sensible starting point, providing care and comfort to our elders. Beyond this, obtaining qualifications in mental health is requisite to many peer support roles and as such, an exploration of relevant study opportunities would seem to align with your career aspirations.

Most importantly, I believe that to achieve a sustainable and satisfying career, a balance between work and other aspects of their life, is essential. Consequently, I always recommend a 'stepping stone' approach where you prioritise one, or possibly two, actions at a time. This enables a fuller learning experience, while also recognising the time and resource constraints faced by most people.  

Lastly, your intelligence shines through in your posts, so I'm sure that you are already aware of these considerations. Moreover, your lived experiences provide you with a compass for knowing 'what's right for you', including the identification of short, medium, and longer term priorities that take your individual circumstances into full account.

'If you can dream it, you can do it' (Walt Disney)